I received some feedback about the
blog I posted on Friday which was quite hurtful, frustrating, and
disturbing. I was accused of whining
throughout my post and that everything that I had written about screamed ‘Woe
is me … and spoke of how entitled I am.”
This was completely not what I intended, nor, do I see how this was a
conclusion based on what I wrote. I
have spent the last 4 years working in inner city St. Paul and asking open
questions of the clients that I am with about how race not only effects our
therapeutic relationship, but how it effects their daily lives. I can’t change the color of my skin any more
than others can change theirs.
Regardless, I want to address white privilege and what we can do about
it.
I have recently finished reading the
book Small Great Things by Jodi
Piccoult. I’m going to include a few
quotes from that book here because I think she has written clearly what I want
to present to my readers.
“I
know you think nothing’s changed, and maybe it hasn’t for you. But for me, it has,” I say. “I hear you,
loud and clear. I may not deserve it,
but I’m begging you to give me one last chance.”
“Why
should I?” Ruth asks, a challenge.
“Because
I told you once I don’t see color… and now, it’s all I see.”
She
starts for the door. “I don’t need your
pity.”
“You’re
right.” I nod. “You need equity.”
Ruth
stops walking, still facing away from me.
“You mean equality,” she corrects.
“No,
I mean equity. Equality is treating
everyone the same. But equity is taking differences into account, so everyone
has a chance to succeed.” I look at
her. “The first one sounds fair. The second one is fair.
It’s equal to give a printed test to two kids. But if one’s blind and one’s sighted, that’s
not true. You ought to give one a Braille test and one a printed test, which
both cover the same material. All this
time, I’ve been giving the jury a print test, because I didn’t realize that
they’re blind. That I was blind. Please, Ruth. I
think you’ll like hearing what I have to say.”
Slowly,
Ruth turns around. “One last chance,”
she agrees. (pg.427)
I hadn’t read the part about
equality versus equity before writing my previous post. I know from my work, that equality isn’t what
people really think it is. It is what
the white person thinks is best for the various ethnicities across the world
(in essence perpetuating white privilege).
Merriam-Webster defines equal as “like for each member of a group,
class, or society”. This makes sense –
and it is what we, as an American people have been taught. But equity, as defined by Merriam-Webster, is
“justice according to natural law or right; specifically: freedom from bias or
favoritism.” Now, that definition – that
is what I want for all people… and I think that if you think about it this is
what you want for all American people, as well.
Consider this…
“I
look right at juror number 12, the teacher.
“Finish this sentence,” I say. “I am …?” I pause at the blank. “Maybe you’d answer: shy. Or blond. Friendly. Nervous, intelligent, Irish. But the majority of you wouldn’t say white.
Why not? Because it’s a
given. It’s identity that is taken for
granted. Those of us who were lucky
enough to be born white are oblivious to that good fortune. Now, we’re all blissfully unmindful of lots
of things. Probably, you did not give
thanks for showering this morning, or for having a roof over your head last
night. For eating breakfast and having
clean underwear. That’s because all
those invisible privileges are easy to take in stride.” (Piccoult, 2016, p.429).
Does reading that make you
uncomfortable? Does it make you
think? What kind of feelings are raised
in side of you?
When my furnace died a few weeks
ago, my immediate thought was that I couldn’t possibly afford to fix my
furnace… I couldn’t afford anything extra right now. And then that same night, when all I wanted
was to take a warm shower… my shower didn’t work. I used to take for granted something as
simple as my shower… of all things that go wrong and break in my house, I did
not expect my shower to fail on me.
That night I had a bite of my pride taken away. God knew that in order to open my eyes and
humble me that I needed to know the things that I take for granted.
This whole process of learning what
it is like not to have sucks. It’s an unhappy
process. It’s an unequal process. It’s not fair. To continue to have to be responsible and
pay my bills, to not live off of someone else's generosity, to know that you
have someone in your life that is essentially living for free off of your good
will pisses me off. To only buy what I
absolutely need and now what I or the kids want. This is not equal. This is not fair. This is what my last post was about.
This does not have anything to do with white privilege.
“When
I was researching this book, I asked white mothers how often they talked about
racism with their children. Some said
occasionally; some admitted they never discussed it. When I asked the same question of black
mothers, they all said, Every day.
I’ve
come to see that ignorance is a privilege, too.
So
what have I learned that is helpful?
Well, if you are white, like I am, you can’t get rid of the privilege
you have, but you can use it for good.
Don’t say I don’t even notice
race! like it’s a positive thing. Instead recognize that differences
between people make it harder for some to cross a finish line, and create fair
paths to success for everyone that accommodate those differences. Educate yourself. If you think someone’s voice is I being
ignored, tell others to listen. If your
friend makes a racist joke, call him out on it, instead of just going along
with it.” (Piccoult, 2016, p. 463).
"If I cannot do great things, I
can do small things in a great way." -Martin Luther King Jr
Take Martin Lutheran King, Jr’s words to heart and go – make a difference in
your community; fight for equity, educate yourself, and teach others.
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