Dare to be Different

I currently have over 100 books on my "to read" book list.  This book list keeps growing - there are books on there that I have read before and never finished, there are books that I've read many times and simply want to read again, and there are books on there that have been sitting on my bookshelf and I've never read them.  I've created this book list to remind me to continue growing intellectually; especially since I'm not in school anymore.  So, this is the year (or the next couple) that they will get read.  However, after finishing For Women Only I was struggling with which one to read next.  I have a couple of books that I'm part way through, but I didn't have the focus for any of them.  So I scrolled through the list on my phone and found the title Choosing God's Best: Wisdom for Lifelong Romance.  I seriously wasn't wanting to read another book on relationships, especially after reading Boundaries in Dating and For Women Only ... I was really thinking another title on my list might entice me... but it didn't.  So, I decided I'd read the first chapter and see if it had anything good to say.

Let me tell you, even in the introduction, I was like... "Hmmm... even though this was published in the 1990s and I have no idea where I got it from, it's not too bad.  Maybe I'll read chapter 1."  Then I got to a section in chapter one entitled "Dare to be Different".  I have ALWAYS felt that I have done things differently. I like doing things differently, rather than being a follower.  I'm okay with the fact that the choices that I make might not make sense to the rest of the world or my parents or my sister or whomever... but to trust myself and the ways that God prompts me.

And then I read this...
(taken from the book Choosing God's Best, 1998, p.28)

Dare to be Different

Starting in a new direction is usually frightening, particularly if everyone else isn't moving in the same direction you are. How many people do you know who have purposely chosen not to date because they are waiting for that one person God has chosen for them? Scary, isn't it? Yet God calls His people to a higher standard than the standard of the world. The basic demand on the Christian is the demand to be courageously different. And that's precisely where the problem lies - courtship makes you different.

The world likes a pattern and is suspicious of nonconformity. How distinct should the line be between the man and woman of the world and a follower of Christ? Jesus clearly states that when we come to Him by faith, God has chosen us out of the world (John 15:19). We can no longer be "part of the group" in the same way as before.

It takes faith and courage to wait on God. [BOY! Haven't I learned this lesson the hard way!] "Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord" (Psalm 27:14). Waiting for the Lord means pausing for further instructions. We get in trouble when we make decisions impulsively [yup], without waiting for God's timing and God's thinking. "But I'm thirty years old," you say. What does age have to do with it? Some people are forty years old and unmarried. While you're saying "poor them," they'll be saying "poor you" if you marry the wrong person. God has a reason for requiring patience... Let your heart take courage so you can resist following your own schedule and timing rather than God's, so you can resist the pressure of other people's attitudes and opinions, and so you can resist your own fear of failing to find a relationship.

I shared my previously written personal boundaries in dating with another person that I've known for a long time, and he said "poor guy".  I, however, disagree.  And now those personal boundaries in dating are even further amended to reflect what I believe is aligned with what a God-honoring relationship would look like.  The things that I have chosen and the way that I have chosen to live my life have to be different. They are a reflection of my desire to follow God in everything that I do, my desire for growth, and a need to protect my children.